VoldeGoo
by johnydeath13
Summary: This is just a crossover that I wanted to do. Not much good with summeries so, basically a "real life" enclave helps defend Hogwarts in the final battle. History is little different as I made them virtually the Blades from TES. Timeline is different too.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **This will be my first fan-fic. Something I've wanted to do for a while. Basically, it will just be a huge Harry Potter crossover with whatever the fuck I want to add. Enjoy or don't, I don't give a shit. I'm writing this mostly for myself.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but the General and possibly the President. Haven't decided if I'm gonna make the president an OC or not.

**Chapter One: The Beginning of the End**

Harry's POV…

As Harry walked down the tunnel, only a torch lighting the way, he knew what he had to do. He had to kill Voldemort. Damn Moldy-Mort. He just hoped he lived to tell people of this day.

"Harry!" He looked up to find Hermione staring at him.

"What? What's wrong?"

"You've been standing there for nearly fifteen minutes now. Are you okay?" Neville just stood there, waiting. Ron pulled something out of his pocket, presumably some Burty Bots Every Flavor Beans.

Just then they heard what sounded like Muggle helicopters. They knew they were safe, but were wondering what they were hearing.

'Certainly not Death Eaters, they don't even know what a Helicopter is' Thought Harry.

"Maybe we should hurry; the castle may be in more danger than we thought." Everyone nodded their agreement and started running down the long tunnel.

**One Hour Later…**

Harry's POV…

They exited the portraight and headed straight for the great hall. What they found there was nothing short of torture. Straight, orderly tables with blank faces filling the seats, everyone concentrated on their work.

"Harry Potter?" Dollorus Umbridge said, in a small pathetic voice.

Before anyone could answer they heard that noise again. The helicopters.

"What is that? Who's doing that? I demand you stop! Children, get back to your work, I'll be back in a second." And with that she started walking towards the door. She never made it. As she was halfway down the hall we heard voices.

"Setting the charge… Missiles or Mini Nukes, Sir?"

"Too big for anything but Mini Nukes. Set the timer for fifteen seconds. Are the snipers in position?"

"Yes, Sir."

And with that we heard a tick and then fifteen beeps…

The Generals POV…

As the door exploded and my men rushed in, only one thought ran through my mind. No survivors. I heard screaming, but knew the boys weren't actually hurting anyone. Eventually things settled down.

"I am The General of The Enclaves major land, air and sea forces. It has recently come to our attention that the 'Wizarding World' is under a seriously oppressed government and in the middle of a civil war. I have been authorized to use deadly force in the aid of calming any resistance to humanities efforts for peace. If you thwart those efforts, you will be put down."

"Who are you? What is the meaning of this? There is no 'Civil War'! I demand that you…" I cut the overly-controlling bitch off.

"Ma'm, if you 'demand' one more thing, I can have you detained. Furthermore, the Enclave is an ancient organization dating back to the early second century. We are commandeering this school and all its resources to fight the impending battle that will happen here." She looked upset at this. I'm already debating how I'll kill her. Melting the skin off her bones with a plasma rifle might send a pretty strong message.

"You have no business here. Leave now. In fact, I'm not even sure how you got here. No matter, naughty children must be PUNISHED!" Suddenly she drew a stick out of her jacket. My men immediately responded. She froze in place, not quit knowing what was happening.

I drew my pistol, and aimed at her.

"You just made the biggest mistake of your life." I pulled the trigger and the over-heated goo shot out. Hit her square in the face, and all her flesh and meat dissolved into a pile of goo on the floor, her bones soon falling down into the mess.

"Clean it up, and get me Harry Potter. I'll be in my office. Contact me when the President arrives. I got shit to do."

"Yes Sir, right away Sir."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: **This will be my first fan-fic. Something I've wanted to do for a while. Basically, it will just be a huge Harry Potter crossover with whatever the fuck I want to add. Enjoy or don't, I don't give a shit. I'm writing this mostly for myself. From this point on it will only be from the General POV. In case you were wondering, the General is me and he will react as I would react in these situations. If you don't like it, you can go flying fuck yourself. If you do, you get Internet cookies. So… nothing.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but the General and possibly the President. Haven't decided if I'm gonna make the president an OC or not.

**Chapter Two: The Brotherhood of Steel**

"Sir, we found Harry Potter. He was one of the students here, but apparently he was some major asset to both sides. He fled and only turned back up here minutes before us." The, overly bored yet surprised Private.

"Hmm, strange. Very well, bring him in."

"Yes, sir. Oh, and the Brotherhood arrived as well. Should I send them in as well?"

"Yes, dismissed." I said with a half-hearted salute. He saluted back walked away, with a 17 year old boy walking in after him.

"They told me to see you. You said something about a Civil War before?" He was nervous, for obvious reasons after seeing his, something or other, teacher melted down to bones and goo just minutes before.

"Yes, it would seem your illegal government has been at war with a man by the name of Tom Riddle. You are, apparently, a person of interest in this war. You will be outfitted and armed then sent with the Brotherhood of Steel to take down this man. Haven't heard from our contacts here in the "Wizarding World" for several months, but they seem to believe only you can kill him. I say we blow the fucker up, but we have to maintain a public image. So, that's out." I could tell I had lost him. Fuck, I hate kids.

"Who's the squirt?" Neither of us noticed the Brotherhood walk in.

"He's your new partner. Harry, this is the Elite squad of the Enclave, the Brotherhood of Steel. Handpick 'em myself. No one gets in without my say so. Best killers in the world, and that's saying something. The team is much larger, but we have here with us Wade Wilson, Player, Courier, the former Boss of the Third Street Saints, and, my brother, Remy Lebough. They will, from this moment on, be your brothers, teammates, and family all in one. Congrates, you're in the Brotherhood. You play your cards right and you might even end up in the Lyons' Pride." The kid was a little confused, but seemed to grasp the fact that now he was considered one of the most deadly men on earth and that he was taking orders from a Certifiably Insane military commander.

"What's the Lyons Pride?" Should have expected that.

"A bunch of greedy, power loving fucks that only think of themselves. Dicks." God damn it, why the fuck did ever recruit him.

"Ghost! They are the Presidents elite guard. More elite than even the Brotherhood, but not trained for combat. Their trained from birth to be the ultimate defenders. Deadpool, you are to go set up snipers on the upper floors. Wanderer, go to the bridge and scout it, then set up guards around the castle. Ghost, take the trees out. No cover for the morons. Courier, take the kid, set up a feast. The President is only five minutes out. Get the machine set up for the anthem. And prepare the flags. Let the staff know what's going on. And make sure the Vertibirds will be ready for tomorrow. I want the mages at the bridge; they'll be able to deflect the earliest spells while we wait for the Dovah."

"Yes, sir." they all said in unison.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: **This will be my first fan-fic. Something I've wanted to do for a while. Basically, it will just be a huge Harry Potter crossover with whatever the fuck I want to add. Enjoy or don't, I don't give a shit. I'm writing this mostly for myself. In case you were wondering, the General is me and he will react as I would react in these situations. If you don't like it, you can go flying fuck yourself. If you do, you get Internet cookies. So… review.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but the General and possibly the President. Haven't decided if I'm gonna make the president an OC or not.

**Chapter Three: Wait, you have no nose?**

"What is all this?" the boy, Harry Potter, asked.

"The banners are the Enclave flag, the ones over the table up there are Brotherhood flags, and the machine will play the Enclave Anthem. The reason it's so large is because of the power it has. We will also play it just before the battle tomorrow." I said, smiling. Did these people not pay attention to the world around them? Surely they know of 'the Dragonborn'. As much as I hate that accursed title.

"Why is the Brotherhood flag just a gear with two smaller gears and wings? What is it?" I hate having to explain things. Fuck it all, might as well tell him the truth. Later, though, not now.

"The large gear represents the Paladin, Gambit. The smaller gear represents the Knights, Deadpool, Player, and Courier. The smallest represents the Scribe, Ghost. The wings represent Unity, and the sword represents our power in combat. The Enclave flag represents the number of Presidents we've had in the stars. The E should be obvious." I said, sitting down in the largest seat at the Brotherhood table.

"Sir," I knew it was too good to be true, why should I be able to enjoy a dinner for once. Fuck. "The President is here."

Just as he said that the man himself walked through the door. All the men stood at salute. I was two, but more relaxed. I knew him, he was insane, sure, but not enough to kill those he respected, and trusted.

The man, or rather god, was named Sheogorath. The god of madness, the madgod. He wore a modern suit, half dark purple and half gold. The shirt was the same, but reversed. The tie was checkered the same coloration. His blind eyes somehow eating the soul of every man in the room. White beard and hair clearly trimmed down, he was very stylish if nothing else. Haskill was right behind him. Gods knew I hated the man, but I'd never say that to Lord Sheogorath. Like I said, he already knew.

"Sir! I have to say, it's good to see you again." I couldn't believe what I heard next. I hate kids, especially dumb ones.

"Oi! 'o the bloody 'ell is that?" The goddamned ginger who said sat back down after I gave him a stare that would have scared Talos himself. Come to think of it, I did scare Talos once. He'd never say it though, the bastard.

"This is the Lord Sheogorath. The one deadric prince not to be born of divine blood. He is the god of madness, the mad god, and the President himself. Before you speak again, just think of all the painful expiriments there is waiting for those who disrespect him." I think I actually made him piss himself. Fucking wimp.

"Haskill, take the Lyons' Pride to their quarters. This feast may take awhile." Hahahaha, I wouldn't have to see the bastard all night. That's my sole victory.

Most went on with conversations about us, the President, even interpretations of our flag. It was mildly amusing.

"Sir, the machine is ready. Should we pre-pair a translator?" He was one of my favorite lieutenants'.

"No, just play the damn song so we can eat. Oh, by the way, my Lord, this is the newest addition to the Brotherhood. He should make a nice replacement to Strange, since we parted ways. He is to be taught about us though. Doesn't know much. Then again, I don't think many people do."

"Yes, yes. Harry Potter… your new name is hawk. Understand?" No remorse for the newbie.

"Yes, uh, mister, uh, Sheogorath, sir." Fucking kids nervous. I love it.

"Good, GOOD! I'm so happy, I could just pluck out your eyes! HAHAHAHAHA!" Please do.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: **This will be my first fan-fic. Something I've wanted to do for a while. Basically, it will just be a huge Harry Potter crossover with whatever the fuck I want to add. Enjoy or don't, I don't give a shit. I'm writing this mostly for myself. In case you were wondering, the General is me and he will react as I would react in these situations. If you don't like it, you can go flying fuck yourself. If you do, you get Internet cookies. So… review.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but the General and possibly the President. Haven't decided if I'm gonna make the president an OC or not.

**Chapter Four: Dovahkiin**

"It's ready sir." The kids will probably want to know translations, fuck.

"Alright, start it up!" The soldiers saluted and the brotherhood stood as the music began.

"_Dovahkiin, Dovahkiinnaal ok zin los vahriinwah dein vokul mahfaeraak ahst vaal!Ahrk fin norok paal graanfod nust hon zindro zaanDovahkiin, fah hin kogaan mu draal!Huzrah nu, kul do od, wah aan bok lingrah vodAhrk fin tey, boziik fun, do fin gein!Wo lost fron wah ney dovahrk fin reyliik do julvoth aan suleyk wah ronit faal kreinVey zeim hokoron pahol fin Dovahkiin komeyt ok rein!Alduin, feyn do jun,kruziik vokun staadnau,voth aan bahlok wah diivon fin lein!Nuz aan sul, fent alok,fod fin vul dovah nok,fen kos nahlot mahfaeraak ahrk ruz!Paaz Keizaal fen kos stin nol bein Alduin jot!Dovahkiin, Dovahkiinnaal ok zin los vahriinwah dein vokul mahfaeraak ahst vaal!Ahrk fin norok paal graanfod nust hon zindro zaanDovahkiin, fah hin kogaan mu draal!"_

"Well, how about a party? Cheese! Cheese for everybody!"

"Yes, in the spirit of this being a school we shall hold a dance." Damn, shouldn't have done anything, I say.

"Uh, sir?" Hawk, fuck!

"Yes, what is it?" This better not be about the machine again. "What was that song? It seemed to… radiate… power. Lots of it." Huh, not what I expected, but I'll take it.

"It's the Enclave Anthom. It's in the ancient Dov tongue. What's that, you ask? It's the Dragon Language." Shit, said too much.

"Dragon language? Dragon's can't talk!"

"Oh? FOHS ROE DAH!" I shouted. Immediately all the candles went out and several object's flew away.

"Wha… what was that?" Poor kid. Almost pity what I have to tell him.

"It was a shout. Three words of power in the Dragon Language. YOL!" I shouted as fire shot out of my mouth. Everyone except the Brotherhood was used to it by now, barring one new recruit. This is gonna be one long night.

_**Later that night…**_

"Hey, who's gonna play?" asked the bushy haired girl. Bitch.

"The General is of course. He's quite a singer." Ha, I love it when Mystique shows up like that.

"_During our final hours, I would like to talk straight down to earth in a language we can all easily understand…" _I'm up.


End file.
